(the) Jebbica

I am on a number of social networking sites, from Facebook to Twitter to MySpace to LinkedIn.  And then there’s the sites like Digg, Reddit, StumbleUpon, del.icio.us, and the like.  Then there are the blogging platforms, like WordPress, Blogger, TypePad, Live Journal, all of which I am a part of.  And forums! I don’t even want to get started on forums.  So basically, I am not a stranger to having an online presence.  If anyone ever decides to go looking for me, they’re not going to have to look very hard.  Google “Jessica P. Wallin“, and you will come across my Flickr photo stream, my former blog,  my MySpace, my Amazon profile, and some articles I’ve written for Idol Mania. And that’s just on the first page.  If you Google “Jebbica”, you will find this blog, my profiles on Backseat Cuddler, MyBlogLog, and The Insider.  Now, I am aware that I may be a bit more internet-friendly than most.  It has been a wonderful way for a shy girl like me to feel connected with the world and share what I have to say and meet people like me who aren’t limited to my small Southern town.

Facebook, especially, has been a great place to stay in contact with people, meet new people, and manage the various business contacts I have or could potentially have.  I have quite a few “friends”, all of whom generally fit into the following categories:

• Family:  my own flesh and blood, people I generally see on a regular basis, but thanks to Facebook, I can now get to know them even better because it gives more insight into who these people really are outside of family gatherings.
• Friends:  my real friends, the people I hang out with on weekends.
• Coworkers:  I see them all the time at work, but hey! Sometimes the verbal banter only goes so far.  Aww, isn’t that a cute picture of your kid!
• Former coworkers: People I used to work with and might not get to see as much as I’d like anymore, and it’s nice to stay in touch.
• People I went to high school/college with:  Oh, we once stood in line at the same water fountain? You dated so-and-so, a friend of a friend, and I don’t really know you. But I know your face, and this is a small town, after all. We’re probably related.  We’re not the same people we were then, so why not? Let’s get to know each other. You never know what might come out of it, or what kind of friendship might evolve because you were bold enough to say on Facebook what you might never get a chance to in Real Life.  This includes teachers, too.
• Blogging buddies:  Hey, your blog is awesome! You like my blog, too? Cool! Let’s be friends!  Wouldn’t it be so cool if we knew each other in the Real World?
• Modeling/Photographer contacts: Because generally, these are a great group of people, and you never know when there might be a photo shoot that interests you or when you could use or give professional advice.
• Musicians/fellow critics:  This allows me to stay up-to-date on what’s happening, and in the event there’s something going on I’d like to cover, I have an “in”. And chances are, I will return the favor.
• Friends of friends: Oh, so you’re friends with this person? Well then chances are, you’ll like me, too!
• People I went to church with:  Wow, I can’t believe you have a Facebook!  You know what The Internet is? That is so cool!
• General people I admire:  I think you’re great.  I wanted you to know.

This adds up to quite a lot of people, and it has allowed me to peer into other people’s lives (un-stalker-ish-ly, I’d hope) and expand my horizons to the ways in which people completely different from me think.  I rarely have anyone on my friends list that I never talk to, because almost everyone has something to say that interests me.  And you might think that keeping up with that many people would consume a lot of time, but it really doesn’t.  In fact, once I eliminated all of the Farmville, Yoville (what the heck is a Yo-ville, anyway?!), Sorority Life, and Mafia Wars junk from showing up on my home page, I have a pretty easy time figuring out what it is people have to say, and I like what I see.  And people don’t generally update their thoughts that often, so even among having so many contacts, it’s easy to run out of things to do in a small amount of time.

So, what I don’t get, are social networking snobs.  For one, it’s called a SOCIAL NETWORK for a reason. One, so you can be social.  Two, so you can network. See how that works? One of the things that irks me so much is when someone says, “Do I know you?” Like, if you did, is your memory so limited that you have to ask? Seriously. I’m sure in all likelihood you aren’t so great that I am a little peon with hopes of feeding you grapes and washing your feet. Get over yourself. If someone sends me a friend request, I assume it is because they already know me, or they would like to get to know me. Are you going to shun someone who comes up to you on the street and introduces themselves? “Hi! My name is PokemonLuver48! What’s your name?” “Uh, do I know you?” I don’t know about you, but I would never say something like that. I would be flattered that someone was making the effort. Maybe I will be granted access into this person’s psyche and learn that there is much more to this person than Pokemon. And maybe there isn’t. But I gave it a try, didn’t I?

And honestly, what’s the harm in that? I’m not a “friend-whore”, by any means. But I’m not a snob. I don’t see any harm in being friendly. Who wants to live in a cave and be a hermit? And if that is the case and you do, then why do you have a Facebook page at all?

In my inbox: “[The Boyfriend] sent you a GOP Valentine’s Day Card!”

My personalized message:  “Specifically the closed door where I keep the children that I eat.  That is what I do. I am Nancy Pelosi.

I love you Jessica,  [The Boyfriend]”

Remember gutting that fish? It’s starting to sound better all the time.

Valentine’s Day. Whether you’re single, married, or are dating someone, there is ample opportunity for this made-up holiday to potentially become one of the year’s more memorable days, for better or worse.  Of course, if a special someone proposes to you on V-Day, you’re going to remember it for the rest of your life, as cliché as it might in all reality be.

But for most people, there is a lot of pressure put on this day, and for what?  After all, it’s just another holiday created by retail giants hoping to get consumers to spend money on greeting cards, candy, and jewelry.  As you can see from an article in the photo above I wrote for the school paper some TEN YEARS AGO (good God, I’m old), I was jaded about Valentine’s Day then, and I’m jaded about it now.  Just think, how lovely and curmudgeonly will I be in another forty or so years? I can’t wait to know me then!

The Boyfriend and I don’t generally ever do anything special for Valentine’s Day.  It has sort of become a tradition to go eat Indian food, then maybe go shopping and try to say “I love you” a little bit more.  But in all honesty, we’ve been doing a lot of that on regular ordinary non-Hallmark days.  So, I wasn’t really putting too much stock into us planning anything romantic for this weekend.

It doesn’t help that my youngest sister’s birthday is also on this day. (She used to date a guy whose birthday was also on Valentine’s Day…can you imagine? It was almost too barf-worthy to be true!).  So, I’m looking at my weekend schedule, and it’s pretty much booked solid.  It starts with a Pure Romance party at a friend’s house on Thursday evening, segues into a female family movie night on Friday, parlays into us getting our taxes done Saturday afternoon, a concert Saturday evening with several friends and coworkers, a Rock Band party at a friend’s house late Saturday night, and concludes with church and birthday cake with the family Sunday afternoon.  And of course the weather is supposed to be terrible Sunday evening.

I just didn’t think there was going to be any need to bother with the fuss of spending money we didn’t have on each other. We already know we love each other, and no amount of paper hearts is going to make it anymore apparent!  And yet, apparently The Boyfriend is kind of sad about this.  “Maybe he was planning a surprise?” my BFF asked.  Doubtful, since it’s the norm for me to say I WANT THIS instead of trying to bother with dropping hints and winding up disappointed.  So, I texted him during work yesterday and bluntly asked him. “Were you planning a surprise for V-day?”

His answer: “Fishing?”

FISHING?  “You want to dig worms and gut fish? Seriously? How romantic,” I texted in reply.  Now, that may be romantic to someone, but it ain’t me!  And I didn’t think The Boyfriend found it particularly seductive, either.

There was a long pause between our two phones before he sent me an answer.

He had been asking if I was fishing for compliments.

So, the jury is still out on whether or not there is an actual surprise in store for me, or if VD (aptly named, in my opinion) will be just another day.  All I know is, if I wind up ever having to gut a fish, there’d better be a damn ring inside it.