(the) Jebbica

The economy is rough. We all know that, and we’ve all been reminded of it plenty of times.  One never knows when she is going to learn that she will no longer be needed in her designated position.  And so, we hold onto what jobs we have, for as long as they’ll let us, even after we start to resent going there everyday.

So you stick it out.  But you start to get jaded, and the little things you used to not even notice start to really bug you. Everyone has gripes about their jobs.  But now, when you do decide to have a roll-your-eyes moment at the position, you’re greeted with “Welcome to the real world!” and “At least you have a job!”-type comments.  Wow. I have a job.  What a great accomplishment.

I refuse to believe that it is difficult to find a job, even in this economy.  I’ve had friends who insist they’ve been looking for work, any work, for months.  All of these people are hunting, and the day I decide I’d like to take on a second job to earn a little extra income, I got hired on the spot at the first place I went to.  Ever heard of Craigslist?  If you are smart enough to sort out the scam jobs, there are plenty of people looking to hire.  State Labor Department?  Quite a few jobs there, and at least you know those are legitimate and you won’t be flooded with a million unnecessary emails daily (ahem, careerbuilder.com).  So, I’m sorry. But I’m calling BS on all these people who can’t find work.  There’s work.  But is it the job you want to do? I didn’t last at Job #2 long.  I had done that sort of work before and hated it. It only took me two days to remember how much.  I would gladly sacrifice the extra income for my sanity.

As far as the “Welcome to the real world” comments, I have a few thoughts on that one, as well.  Sure, there’s work out there.  But eventually, when it comes to long-term planning, shouldn’t one do something that doesn’t actually feel like work?  “Do what you love and love what you do”…isn’t that another one of those clichés? A career should be something you love to get up in the morning and do, something you’re proud to do; something that overall improves your well-being and happiness.  But honestly, are there any jobs out there like that anymore?  Because I actually love the work I do now.  The pay sucks, there are no benefits whatsoever (on holidays and days we’re closed, I am just SOL on pay), but the work itself is fun.  Of course there will be drama…I work with a bunch of middle-aged women, after all.  And of course you know about the one woman who can never be pleased, no matter what I try to do.  I am Miss Eager to Please and she is Miss Impossible to Please, so any kind of relationship we could have is really not healthy for either of us. But even she is great on most days, so compared to other places I’ve worked (ahem, Wal-Mart), drama is pretty minimal.  What I don’t understand is why it seems everywhere I’ve worked just seems so ungrateful to its employees and completely apt to screw the pooch (at one place I worked, that phrase was literal).  Millions or billions of dollars are being made.  There is always a lot of money being made…by someone.  But then the lower-level bosses and employees are screwed at every given opportunity.  Shirked of benefits.  Made to work off-the-clock.  These are the people who really keep things going, the heart and soul of the companies.  And yet they are treated like vermin.  The people who do the most make the least, and the people do the least make the most.  The real world, ehh?  Well, I have another thing to say about that. The real world sucks!

Is there a solution?  At what point will I ever transition into that adult period where I actually can make enough money to own my own home, afford a wedding, and afford children? Am I destined to be a 29 hour-per-week clerk for the rest of my life? Because you can’t go to school without money, and you can’t make money unless you’ve been to school…and that little Catch 22 is about the most disheartening fact that I’ve ever encountered in my life.  Some people just can’t win for losing, and unfortunately, I am one of those people.  But I’m not going to let it defeat me—I won’t.  Life is too short not to get to live out all your dreams…I just need some sort of stepping stone.  If I just knew things could possibly go in that direction…if I just knew how it’s all done.  Because obviously, hard work isn’t enough.  There must be some sort of recipe.  Do I even know what I want to be when I grow up?  Not a clue.  But by now, I’ve worked enough places to know what I don’t want to be, and so perhaps by process of elimination, I will finally have something down by the time I’m old enough to retire (which with my luck, retirement will be totally obsolete by the time I’m of age).  I just need to find where to take that leap…could someone please point me in the direction of where to jump?

“Off a bridge” is not an option.

“Oh, Jessica! Is that you? I almost didn’t recognize you. You’ve put some weight on!”

This is how I was greeted by someone today.  Yes, people do feel the need to be this frank with me.  Apparently, in life, I have learned that I just have this look on my face that says, please feel free to cut me down or just ignore me completely! And if you don’t believe the second part of that sentence, just ask anyone who has ever been out to eat with me. Who always asks questions to thin air? And who never, ever gets a refill? This girl!

Being told you look fat today does not do any favors towards guaranteeing you are going to have a pleasant and happy day, as I have unfortunately discovered.

Apparently, drama will occur even if there is no warrant for such.  For instance, with my day job, I have never wanted to give anyone an excuse to be upset with me because I wasn’t motivated to do my job.  I might only be part-time, but I have always made sure I get at least as much accomplished as the full-time help.  I was hired in a “helper”, which I took to mean that I was meant to help those who were too overloaded to complete their tasks.  When someone could use an extra hand, I’m there.  So today, I overhear two of my coworkers talking about some important letters that needed to be mailed TODAY, and they didn’t know how they were going to get the chance to get the task done. So, what do I do? I offer to do them.  I say, hey, I can help! I can have those envelopes printed off in less than three minutes.  Did I mention there were only eleven of them?  Not 300, like I am used to doing weekly for the Big Boss.  It should be a snap, and no trouble at all for me to get out for them.  So, because I am not actually lazy and I can’t be complained about on that account, one of the coworkers complains on me for wanting to help.  She laments that she might as well turn her notice in because I was trying to TAKE HER JOB.  If the only thing she has to do is print out ELEVEN ENVELOPES, I’d say her job is pretty unnecessary anyway, wouldn’t you?  So, sure. Go ahead and turn your notice in.  Maybe it will admonish some of those furlough days that we keep having. And maybe I could possibly see a benefit or two, like a holiday that doesn’t make me SOL come payday?

ELEVEN. ENVELOPES.

It’s days like today when I have to wonder, why am I one of those people who just can’t win for losing.  Some people can say and do anything they want, and everyone loves them.  I am timid. Careful about what I say.  I try to go about things the right way. And yet, I am the girl who gets pulled over the day her headlight decides to go out.  Who will never win anything. Who will manage to piss people off no matter how much crap she takes.  Why?  Will I have to learn how to adopt an I-Don’t-Give-a-Flying-You-Know-What attitude?  Just stop caring?  Stop introducing myself as, “Hi, I’m Jessica. I’m a doormat. Please feel free to berate me and steal my boyfriend.”?  Twenty-six years into this game, and I still haven’t figured out an answer.  There are a lot of questions to which I still don’t know the answer, when I thought that surely as I approached thirty wisdom would come.  Wisdom: my elusive friend. Come and play with me! My name is Jessica. I’m a doormat. Please feel free to berate me and steal my boyfriend.

So, who’s excited about the new season of American Idol? I’m a little bit jaded since the space between last season’s finale and now have given our MOST! TALENTED! EVER! group of American Idols from last season ample time to fade into obscurity. All of ‘em. Even that Lambert guy doesn’t make the news much. Oh, what’s that you say? He simulated fellatio on a national music awards program? Oh, okay. But has anyone heard any of his music? Because I watched that video, and all I heard was “Eeeeeeyaaahhhhaaaaaahhheeeeeeeeeehhh!!!!!!!!” and other subsequent phrasings. In fact, I have not heard a single song by one of Season 8’s Idols.

So, it’s another year, another winner. But is it going to matter? Won’t I be more excited about the return of Glee? Wasn’t Anoop Desai my waiter the other night? (What was he thinking, anyway? An Indian-American Idol? He had to have known it was going to come down to three white guys, therefore meaning he could only be a novelty. America! Melting Pot! Huh!)

But, there’s still fun in watching.  The auditions!  The sob stories! The getting to know someone we didn’t know before, and growing to love/hate them! And oh, am I forgetting something?  Oh yes.

ELLEN!!

So, I will have to change up my writing style on Idol Mania this year. Last year recapping went like this:

Simon:  Absolutely horrific. I would rather put my unborn baby’s hand in a blender than have to reduce myself to this rubbish.

Randy:  Yeeeaah, dawg!  You worked it OUT! Little pitchy, though.

Kara: no one cares about Kara’s opinion. NEXT!

Paula:  You were like a adijf daidfjaodfjidfj adfodfjdofj……………(drool)…………kadfjlakfjd………..ladkfjlakjf……???……adkfladkfja…….really nice.

Now, I will have to try to put actual syllables together and make sense of them as being some sort of critique.  Will Ellen become a cartoon character like the rest of them have? Will she have little catchphrases that she will use time and time again?  Well, I guess that is just the fun in finding out! Season Nine: I can’t wait to see what you have in store for me.  My blogging fingers are ready. And hopefully, you will be here to agree with me or curse my opinion, but you will be reading*!

Jebbica, OUT!

*You can check out all my Idol ramblings at Idol Mania.